BALANCING YOUR TWO LOVES: BUSINESS AND RELATIONSHIP
Article by Erron Noel
Balancing Your Two Loves: Business and Relationship
Do you have two loves in your life?! The love of your business AND the love of your life?
Many women do, and many more will as they find work that really honors their soul.
/We all know the changes that this time is bringing into our lives./
Here then arises a dynamic they NEVER saw coming-
GUILT for feeling like they are abandoning one for the other. They LOVE their business/work AND they LOVE their husband/partner.
Have you found yourself feeling this way?!
Have you found yourself sheltering one from the other?!
Hesitating on what you say, when you say it, or if you will share it at all?
Pondering over decisions related to your business or career so you move hardly at all?
Wondering what kind of impact it will have on the state and well-being of your relationship?
Worrying if it will cause an upset or spin you off into defending or explaining yourself?
All to find yourself not saying or doing anything at all! OR, if you do, you keep it secret from “the other”?!
It’s almost like you are having a secret love affair, never being able to bring both loves to the same party! Heaven forbid if they truly found out the extent to which you give to, spend time with and love the other!
You want the relationship with your business or career AND your relationship with your lover to be the best ever! You want to be successful in BOTH!
Well, here’s the TRUTH.
If you can’t act freely, speak freely, to think, to do, to know, to act on in the most exciting, fully enjoyable way for you, you will never be as successful in your businesses or career as you know you could be.
You are not actually the owner of your business or the leader in your work. You are NOT the one who is deciding everything. Your business or career success is hanging on the mercy of your partner’s understanding.
Energetically you are tip-toeing around because you “know” one is not going to approve of the other (what is actually happening in that other relationship).
Here is a scenario:
You come downstairs and walk into the kitchen. Your husband is there enjoying his coffee, making breakfast. You’re ready to get out the door. You pass by him, but you make sure you kiss him on the cheek first. You don’t want to make too much eye contact or stand still. You wanna move on thru. You’re grabbing keys, getting your bag, making quick comments about groceries to add to the list or chores you’d like to see happen around the house this weekend. (Creating small talk. A distraction from the bigger topic.)
You’re almost to the garage (and you’re kinda holding your breath), you shout “Good bye! I love you! Have a great day!!”
And then you’re THERE! Inside your car. Door closed. Everything in your arms and you let out a big sigh. You can relax now and REALLY be you. You can get on with your day and go do what you want freely.
*That whole time you were walking through the kitchen, you were holding your breath, hoping NOT to step on a bomb and feel the explosion. Because then what?! You’d have to explain where you are going, why you are having the marketing meeting that you are, and rationalize why that makes sense to you (despite the money issues you are surely aware of in your relationship). Too much to risk. Too nerve wracking to even entertain. Exhausting to experience.
So despite many women saying they DO have a great relationship with their partner or spouse, the level in which they are able to speak freely, think freely and do freely IS actually impacting the level of success they are experiencing in their work.
Energetically IT IS.
If you hide what you are doing or the details to your business from your partner because it is “easier” this way then that may provide some level of comfort for you.
But there is no denying ENERGETICALLY, it is going to have it’s ripple effects.
In my experience, I loved my business and my husband. And I felt I was betraying both. It was the worst feeling in the world.
And this is no way to live!
Your decisions (and WHY you are making them) ARE influenced by the other.
Very similar to a woman who gets asked out by her Mister but she has to say no (even though she would LOVE to go to that show) because her husband is home and they planned making dinner together. She can’t have both. She can’t experience the joy with both.
You get a text. Somebody is asking if you can take a call right now. The call could possibly lead to the biggest opportunity ever! But you’re already nervous. You’re not sure if you should take it because you “need” to prepare dinner. Your thoughts race, “He would be upset.” Or, even worse, “He would be disappointed.”
You don’t sign on for an incredible program. You loved everything about it. It’s all you have been praying for! But even though it dropped in your lap today, you passed on it.
Rather, in either of these scenarios, he says, “Holy Fuck. I’m SO proud of you!”
And because this ISN’T his response, there IS work to do in your relationship!!!
When you have uncovered and shifted the FEARS that exist from speaking, doing, thinking, or acting upon what it is you are considering you WILL make totally different decisions.
That is, IF you TRULY want to experience ones that align to your highest expression and happiness! THIS is when you will be able to have two LOVES exist in your life at the same time!
