How to Detox from a Slimy Salesman


Written by: Angel Quintana   Photo: Halley Elefante


Chances are, you’ve purchased a thing or two in your life and I’m sure one or more of those products or services worked like a charm, while others failed miserably.

But sometimes it’s not the product or the service that sucked, it was actually the person who sold it to you.

As business owners, selling is part of the gig, for without sales, you really don’t have a business at all. Yet, it’s rarely discussed what happens after the customer gets home. We often think about if the customer will love their new purchase or if will they come back and buy from us again. What we fail to think about all together is whether or not we were a good salesman.

The “sales gurus” might say that “if you closed the deal, you did your job”— but I’m opening that up for debate. What some salesman might not realize is we’re not all idiots. Customers aren’t just people walking around with dollar signs on their backs; they’re actually individuals with problems that needs solving. And lucky for us, they decided to give our product or service a chance. We should feel honored.

If you’ve been slimed by a slimy salesman, I can relate. If you are worried you’ve been a slimy salesman, listen up.


A slimy salesman has an agenda; that agenda is to make a buck. Sure, you might have the most amazing product on the market that does bells and whistles around your competition, but if you push too hard to sell it, you come off as slimy. This could mean you offered too many up sells or kept promoting your products when the customer shared no interest in learning more. It could also mean you tried to show-off how much “knowledge” you had in your brain about the topic, (which is cool for all about 3 minutes), but anything longer than that, and you just sound like a show-off who is craving recognition or worse, you're a slimy salesman.

If you’ve practiced or encountered any of these situations, live and learn or better yet, detox and delete. What most slimy salesman offenders fail to see is what happens when the customer gets home. Sure, some customers will just accept the fact “that’s just a typical salesman”, but it shouldn’t be the norm. And I’m writing this article to scream that it’s gross and disgusting. Shame on you.

In today’s modern digital age, we have a plethora of options to choose from — and everyone has competition. If you run a business, you already know that repeat customers are where the money is at— so why try to sell your new customer the moon, the stars, and the sky all in the first visit? It makes the customer feel icky, like we’ve just been slimed and you just look like desperate.

Here is a quick way to detox from a slimy salesman that doesn’t involve awkward conversations and puts you back in the power position. (And if you're a slimy salesman, you'll learn a thing or two, too.)

I know this sounds drastic, but I assure you there are other options. The internet is filled with awesome products and services that solve the same exact problem, why buy from a slimy salesman who only sees you as a walking dollar sign? You’re a human being, not just a wallet filled with credit cards and anyone who makes you feel less than so, can piss off. Do yourself a favor and delete them from your iPhone right now. (Attn: Slimy salesman, live and learn.)

Since most salesman never really learn why they can’t retain every customer, (because their slime tactics were too aggressive) we can make a small gesture to let them know “we weren’t fully satisfied” by canceling all future appointments. They won’t totally understand why you cancelled, but it will put you back in the power position and help you dry your tears from feeling downright abused!

Most of the time when we’re being sold to, we often forget to check-in with our intuition. Your intuition is there to save you every time you encounter a slimy salesman, so be sure to ask yourself WHY the salesman is giving you something for FREE or giving you a discount on your first oil change. Is it because they plan to up sell you 5 more times during the transaction or do they really want your lifetime business? The only way to find out is to ask. You can usually decide from there if you’ll want to show up for the free service or if if it will cost you 5 times that without your noticing... at first. Use your intuition.

I’m not one for leaving nasty reviews on Yelp or Amazon, because it lowers your vibration and makes your sound like a victim, which is still giving the salesman power over you. When you take the high road and find other businesses who offer comparable products and services, that is the best revenge. The slimy salesman loses your repeat business and you feel more in control of your life and your bank account! Finally!

After all, every thing in life is energy, including sales tactics. If you come off as a desperate, know-it-all salesman who thinks he/she’s clever because you’ve memorized a few facts to make you sound smart during your sales pitch, you can expect a few cancelled appointments.

The best way to gain new business and win back repeat customers is to be upfront about everything. If you’re giving something away for free, tell your prospects why you’re doing so— and be transparent:

  • I want you to think I’m awesome
  • I want you to love my product so much, you tell your friends
  • I want to win your trust
  • I want to sell you other products that will make you a raving fan

Don’t try to sell everything under the sun, even if you think we need it. I assure you, we’ll try it at some point if you take your time and get to know their life and needs. Stop being so promiscuous; we get that enough in our dating life— we don’t need it anywhere else!

If you’ve been slimed my heart goes out to you. Maybe you’ve shed a couple tears or felt like leaving a nasty review, but just know there are better remedies (and revenges) you can proceed with that will leave you feeling empowered, not slimed and never victimized. Triple win.


Angel Quintana is the founder and CEO of Holistic Fashionista®, a business academy and magazine helping philanthropists build boutique brands so they can help change the world. In The Holistic Fashionista Academy, she helps clients discover their Kismet Clients®, develop a product collection that represents their cause, and build well-thought out sales funnels to change more lives and make more money!

In her book, Funnel Foreplay, she teaches change makers how to successfully quickly warm up cold leads and turn them into buyers. While her tattooed exterior shows her creative tough side and her road to success has been difficult, it is her thoughtful approach to brand building and unique selling approach that has won her thousands of raving fans. Angel and her businesses have been featured on: Apparel News,, Law of Attraction Radio, and spoken on stage at Digital Marketing for Business, At The Helm, and Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising in Los Angeles, CA.

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