THE POWER OF SPIRITUAL HEALING
Article by Courtney Maguire
It was August 2007- I woke up one evening with excruciating pain behind my right ear all the way down to the right side of my neck. The next morning, I woke up with the right side of my face drooping and numb! I thought I was having a stroke. I immediately went to the ER to which I was told it was not a stroke, but I was experiencing something called Bell’s Palsy.
The physician explained that this is a virus like the virus that causes cold sores, chicken pox, and shingles. There is no rhyme or reason for contracting it as it’s as sudden onset with no warning. I was told by the physician to just do some facial exercises daily and it would subside to which I did as much as I could, but the days kept going by and still no signs of recovery in my face. I was unable to taste on the right side of my tongue, I couldn’t smile correctly, my right eye watered constantly. My face became paralyzed as the nerves became more and more damaged.
It wasn’t until a year later at my OB/GYN appointment that my Gynecologist noticed my paralysis and told me there were things other than facial exercises that I could’ve been doing to strengthen the nerves in my face. Such things as medication and shock therapy. So, I investigated these other ways of nerve healing and tried them. Although they helped somewhat, my nerves in my face were already paralyzed and could not be undone.
This hurt my heart. I cried so many nights asking, “Why me? Why did this happen to me? Why did my pretty smile get taken away?” I continued to seek answers and solutions. I had MRI’s of my brain to make sure a tumor couldn’t have caused this issue. I saw Ophthalmologists, Optometrists and Neurologists for any kind of hope that this could be fixed. I wanted my beautiful smile back that I once had. I didn’t want to be abnormal or different. I didn’t want to accept this as being my reality. All Specialists told me the same thing: There is nothing to be done.
Years had gone by. I was always angry. I hated meeting new people for fear of having to explain my crooked features. I sabotaged relationship after relationship because of my insecurities. Kids are the worst! They seem to always notice the paralysis right away and ask if I got punched in the face or if I had been in an accident. I hated explaining it. I hated life and what had happened to me.
A few more years went by. I started coming out of my shell more. I went out with friends and partied. Things were starting to feel normal again because I was numbing my feelings with alcohol and meaningless encounters with individuals. I was making poor choices doing anything I could to make myself seem “fun” or make others like me in the wrong ways. I had self esteem issues. Big time.
After a few years of the partying, I settled down a little. I found my now husband, we moved into together and then got married in 2013. I was the happiest I’d ever been in a long, long time however there was still some issues around loving myself that I had. I found myself questioning the love my husband had for me. How could he love ME? I felt like he was getting jipped! Was he getting the shaft because he had a wife whose face didn’t work? Who didn’t look like the normal female? How could this even be? This caused a lot of arguments and tension in our marriage. Even though he would say to me directly he loved me for me and he thought I was beautiful just the way I was, I couldn’t accept it. I was on a downward spiral to Nowheresville again. Sabotaging like I always did! Playing the victim.
It wasn’t until I found my mentor through a series of events that I really found peace and purpose. I was so mesmerized by her! How she just loved life for what it was regardless of the situations or past she’d been through!
I followed her on every platform that I could social media wise. I watched every live video she made, participated in workshops and read her inspirational, educational posts. I wanted to know more! I had this burning desire in me to learn all the things Spiritual and Metaphysical!
I then, through my own growth and journey of loving my Divine Self wholly and unconditionally, began to find my purpose. If I felt the way I felt prior to meeting my mentor, how many other women were feeling stuck or like they weren’t enough too? It took a lot of motivation and courage, but it was time I shared my story with the world and stop hiding behind the crooked smile. I began to be vocal about my story.
I wanted to tell everyone I came across. It was time to stop being ashamed of it and accept this as my power!
I now am a leader! I create a space for women to come and shift their mindset towards their trauma. I give a different perspective and information on ways to energetically heal their trauma and emotions wounds. I lift other women up and in doing so, I am lifting myself up. I am taking my own medicine and I’ve fallen in love with myself all over again. I am my own best friend. It’s magical! Life is what WE make it. Happiness is ours for the taking. All we must do is be willing to reach out and grab it! And together, we rise!